Introduction

This project was created to tell the story of Nicole Breedlove. She defines herself as a “nerdy, masculine-identified published author and activist” and she feels as though her story has the right to be told. She describes her life and the various hardships of being black, female, and a lesbian, and even a combination of the three in her poetry from Aloud. While there is a record of these poems on paper in Aloud, her poems cannot be understood holistically because the performance aspect of it is lost when only presented with the words. There is only one clip of her actually performing, but it still does not do her justice because the performances of the other two poems are missing. In a way, only the people who have seen her perform at the Nuyorican Poets Café have truly experienced her work as a whole. This project allows everyone to experience her story in the most complete and effortless way possible. 

General Questions

Is Nicole Breedlove a pen name? 

No. It is actually my real name. The story from my aunt, who did some research on my family history, is that we come from a band of Black Indians somewhere in Florida. I was never able to confirm that but it would certainly explain my warrior spirit.

Were there any locations in New York City that especially inspired you to write? If so, where were these places and in what ways did they inspire you?

I was kind of a revolutionary nomad in my younger years. I was hanging out and living in the city, Brooklyn, Jersey, Staten Island, the Bronx and Queens. I was hanging out with friends, drinking, writing and performing. Every one of these places inspired me, Brooklyn especially because that’s where I grew up. BedStuy will always be home to me. The people were so right yet so wrong. Some were broken but absolutely survivors. Some were predators. Others were saviors. It is such a great place to learn and explore and grow. I learned about people in Brooklyn. My family and neighbors and friends shaped the person I am today.

Can you tell me a little bit about the Nuyorican Poets Café and how you started performing there?  How old were you at the time? Had you performed your poetry anywhere else prior?

The Nuyorican Poets Café should be designated as an historical institution. So many amazing writers came out of that place. It’s located on the lower east side and the gritty, blue collar, punk, goth, trendy mix of folks is a perfect backdrop to the array of talent that walks in there.

When I was 17 I  met this punker named Finnegan. He was a black dude with a blonde, foot high Mohawk, steel toed boots, a motorcycle jacket and a contagious laugh. He mentioned he was a poet and read some of his stuff to me. I told him I write too and he said he knew some others and why don’t we start a group. I agreed. We called ourselves DarkStar. 

We began performing at community centers, schools, open mics etc. You name it, we performed there. We were all young. The oldest in our group was 20. The youngest was 14. Other artists started calling us the brats but there was no denying our talent. Pretty soon we were making a name for ourselves and we didn’t have to beg for gigs. Folks were coming to us and we were getting paid to do what we loved.

We were performing at the Knitting Factory and Bob Holman approached us. He wanted us to perform at the Nuyorican. We agreed. At that time there was an article written about us in the Village Voice so we were hot. The night we performed was bananas. It was amazing. To this day it is still one of the best feelings ever.

How many times did you perform at the Nuyorican Poet Café?

I can’t even count the number of times I performed there. I performed with the group, DarkStar. Then my friend Malkia and I split off and started our own group, Nia Kuumba so we started performing. I judged a few poetry slams. I entered a couple of slams. It’s my second home.

Did you write any poetry after the ones from Aloud? If so is there a way I can read them or view them? 

I wrote a lot after but didn’t perform as much. After a while all the poets began to sound the same to me. They all began to recite in the same cadence and rhyme. It was less about the content and more about the performance. It annoyed me so much that individuality and creativity disappeared that I just quit the scene. The work took on a whole other meaning.

Here is a video of me performing Front Page or Bust. This was a PBS special on the spoken word in 1991---https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HY7pKQ-Imco

Were there any New York poets who inspired you? If so, then in what ways? 

Pamela Sneed was this amazing poet. She was tall, bald, gorgeous and an excellent writer. She inspired me. Sapphire was another writer whose work touched. Listening to her work made me unashamed in exposing my vulnerabilities.

Had Audre Lorde influenced your poetry at all?

Audre Lorde was my mentor and more importantly, I considered her a friend. She personally called me and my poetry partner Malkia to participate in her I Am Your Sister conference in Boston. Her poetry was the first of its kind. She was a Black lesbian proud of who she was. A warrior spirit like me. She told it as it was.

Where do you live currently?

I actually moved to Omaha, NE.

What do you do for a living?

I am working at a manufacturing company in the accounting department.

What motivated you to create the Our Sista Circle website? How has it evolved?  Is the site what you had envisioned it to be?

About seven years ago I was single and the bar scene is not really a place to meet anyone for a serious relationship. I started looking online. I noticed that a lot of dating sites didn’t cater to women of color. So, I began researching dating sites.

Most of the women were white. If there were women of color they have been inactive for months. I then researched social networking sites and found the same thing. There was tons of websites for women of color but you were only able to leave comments. You could not engage in an IM or chat. Many times we are just looking for friends not necessarily love interests. So I decided to launch OSC. The first free social networking site for lesbians of color in 2009.

I was paying fees each month out of pocket for the site. It became a financial burden. I reached out to the sistas for donations but received very little. I emailed and handwrote many LGBT organizations, companies, churches, school organizations, magazines, radio and television shows and received a lot of rejections. I tried to get corporate and private sponsors but no one wanted to take a chance on an unknown, unproven site. Sadly, in March of 2014 I was forced to shut it down for lack of resources and support. 

Questions on Poems from Aloud

“An Open Letter to Myself” Questions

What was the significance of saying “if it must be told the D train really fucked up my lower back and if it must be told make sure the Library of Congress is notified”? Why did you think it needed to be told?

 I am a poor. I am a woman. I am Black. And, I’m a lesbian. Talk about being at the bottom of every racial, socioeconomic, gender and class level. I wanted the world to know that we exist. I wanted the world to know that my story is important. I wanted the world to know that Nicole Breedlove will never be silent.

It was apparent that feelings of shame had a major role in this poem. What emotions were greater than this shame that fueled you to write this poem?

I would say anger. I was a very driven, angry young woman. I felt wronged by life. I didn’t ask to be gay. I didn’t ask to be poor. I didn’t ask to be Black. I didn’t ask to be a woman but ironically all those made me a much stronger person.

“‘There Must Be a Conspiracy’” Questions

What was the creative process in writing “There Must Be a Conspiracy”?

 When I was in college I joined some of the Black empowerment groups. I attended a couple of meetings and quickly realized that this Black group was solely focused on Black men. Black women had no role except to support whatever decisions Black men made. We did not have a voice. We did not have any struggles except the Black man’s struggle. We were lost in a movement that should have addressed our issues as well but refused to. This poem is the embodiment of that frustration.

What do you think the black woman’s role in society is today in comparison to the black man’s role? Do you believe these roles have changed since you first wrote this poem?

I believe in the past 25 years more Black women are the heads of their household which means they are the only breadwinners in their family. The Black man has taken a secondary role in the household and that’s not a good thing. I was blessed to have married parents that kept me on track but now, more families than ever before are headed by Black women. Where is the Black man?! And if there are good Black men, which I am often told when discussing this topic, then how come the good ones aren’t mentoring the bad ones?! All it takes for evil to thrive is silence.

“Front Page or Bust” Questions

Why do you think people prefer irrelevant stories about well known people? What led you to choose “irrelevance” as the final word used to describe these stories?

 Well I know when I feel like my life is spiraling out of control it’s comforting to know that even celebrities have the ability to be dysfunctional. They aren’t perfect.

Ending the poem with the word Irrelevant was a creative decision. Folks are dying at the hands of the police. Folks are trying to decide between paying the light bill and buying food. But, I need to be worried about some rich, white dude who failed his bar exam. Hold on while I get my violin and tissue.

Why do you think that these famous people are put on the front page of newspapers instead of the more important stories?

 Newspapers are a business and they know celebrities, rumors and gossip sells. Would you rather read about a rapper and the breakup with his long time girlfriend or read about protests and boycotts?! Many have difficult lives. If they are heading to their underpaying job they want to read fluff.  

Even though the headlining celebrity news was not as important as some of the less talked about events you had mentioned in the poem, do you believe that news had any significance? Should we take the title literally when you say “Front Page or Bust?” (Is it a bust if the more concerning stories do not make it to the front page?)

Good eye! Yes, It can be taken literally. But, it can also be taken differently. So either the paper failed to do their job in reporting more important stories or the paper or these celebrities aren’t important unless they make the front page.

How did you go about choosing these references for your poem? Were the events you chose intentional or did they just happen to be in the news when you started writing?

Everything  I recited actually happened. I was incensed that those stories were not being talked about or discussed. When I wrote the poem those things happened months prior without further mention but the story about the dude failing his exam was being followed up on. 

Places of Inspiration: Manhattan

Left: Barnard College

Top Right: Christopher Street Piers

Bottom Right: The LGBT Community Center

Places of Inspiration: Brooklyn

Left: Fulton St. & Nostrand Ave.

Top Right: Grand Army Plaza

Bottom Right: The Brooklyn Academy of Music

"Front Page or Bust" Performance

This video clip was taken from the Youtube video, "'Words In Your Face' from 'Alive From Off Center'" uploaded by Bob Holman, one of the editors of Aloud.
Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HY7pKQ-Imco